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How Decluttering My Home Brought Peace of Mind

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March 14, 2023
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Beta & Mary McDonald

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Clutter, Clutter, Everywhere

The piles were everywhere. Magazines, mail, school papers, kids' artwork, books- there wasn't a level surface anywhere in our house that didn't have "stuff" on it. And every time I walked by one of these piles, I could feel myself tensing up and the cortisol levels in my body soaring.

I tried to stay on top of it, but it seemed like every time I cleared out one pile of stuff, something else immediately took its place. It got to the point where I dreaded birthdays and holidays because of the influx of new stuff I had to manage.

How Clutter Causes Stress

Scientists from Cornell and UCLA have studied the effects of clutter on our well-being, and they are in agreement that clutter causes stress. In the nine-year UCLA study scientists found evidence that mothers, in particular, felt overwhelmed by a cluttered home and were more likely to describe their home in negative terms.

I can relate to these findings. Oftentimes when I’m home, I feel:

  • Exhausted Staring at piles of clutter, knowing it’s something I need to do at some point, is mentally draining. My mind is constantly sorting and evaluating where things should be, because the human brain craves order.
  • Guilty I don’t know about you, by my clutter chastises me from its disheveled corners and makes me feel guilty for its very existence. It whispers: You should really clean up this pile. Why is it always such a mess in here?
  • Overwhelmed The idea of addressing my cluttered home is usually a pretty overwhelming prospect. My husband and I have spent time decluttering and organizing on countless occasions, only to be stymied right out of the gate with, “Where the heck do we start?” Even after a few hours, our progress seemed minimal, and we still had too much clutter.

Decluttering with an Expert

It was obvious that we were getting nowhere on solving our clutter problem. Then, one day (while I was hiding from our clutter via my computer screen), I stumbled onto Joshua Becker’s website, Becoming Minimalist.

There he shared a story about cleaning out his garage one Saturday, ignoring his kids, and coming to the realization that he was putting more value on his possessions than on spending time with his kids. He talked about simplifying his life, getting rid of junk he didn’t use, and making room for more meaningful activities. When he offered a 12-week online course called Uncluttered, I jumped on it.

Why Declutter: Knowing Your Why

One of the first things I learned to do during the course was to define my “why.” In other words, why did I want to embark of the process of decluttering my home? I drew a colorful brainstorming web and kept it pinned up for the entire twelve weeks. I wanted to:

  • Feel calmer in my home
  • Spend less time cleaning
  • Feel less stressed
  • Have more time for family and fun

It was pretty amazing how that piece of paper motivated me to keep chipping away at boxes and bins for all those weeks.

The Hardest Part About Decluttering

Another thing I learned while going through this process is that the hardest part of it was making decisions. Some people say that every piece of paper hanging around your desk is a decision waiting to be made. I think that’s true for the rest of our clutter, too.

That’s why we’d spend hours “decluttering” and not see any progress. We were always left with the things that we were reluctant to make a decision about.

Making Decisions About Clutter

There are some guidelines for making decisions when it comes to clutter. Marie Kondo, author of The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, is famous for her suggestion to hold an object in your hand and ask the question, “Does this give me joy?”

Other guidelines suggest asking yourself, not whether you might use an item in the future, but whether you have used an item in the last two years. If not, pass it along. I ask myself whether I want to take time in the future to deal with it again. The answer is usually no.

As a last resort, if you just can’t decide on some items, put them in a box. Label the box with what’s inside and the date. If you haven’t looked at the box for a year, there’s a good chance you can get rid of it.

What You Gain When You Have Less Stuff

  • Time and Energy When you have less stuff, you have fewer things that need to be managed, cleaned, and organized. You gain back precious time and feel energized to do the things you really want to do.
  • Focus Visual clutter demands our attention and distracts us from being productive. Clearing out the clutter allows us to focus our attention where we want it, on people and things that are important to us.
  • Peace of Mind Removing the constant reminders of tasks to be done reduces stress and allows us some breathing room. It’s easier to relax in a space where every bit of space isn’t occupied by stuff.
  • Creative Possibilities With more time, more space, and a greater sense of calm, you give yourself a chance at listening to your inner muse. Maybe you’ll pull out your old sketchbook, or start quilting again. Or maybe you’ll let yourself relax and daydream about what comes next.

At the end of doing Joshua’s course, our house was definitely less cluttered and easier to clean. We did feel calmer, and we were able to enjoy being home more than usual. Yet, we still struggle with having too much stuff and with letting go.

When I’m feeling stressed, though, I know one thing for absolute certain. If I spend an hour getting rid of what I don’t use and don’t need, I will feel better. And I never miss the stuff that’s gone.


Carter, Sherrie B. “Why Mess Causes Stress: 8 Reasons, 8 Remedies,” Psychology Today, March 2012.

Feuer, Jack. “The Clutter Culture,” UCLA Magazine, July 2012.

Kondo, Marie. The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, Ten Speed Press, 2014.

Vartanian, Lenny R., Kristin M. Kernan, and Brian Wansink. “Clutter, Chaos, and Overconsumption,” Environment and Behavior, 2016.

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